 Editorial by R.U. Sirius Why I'm REVOLTING! Sometimes I think that maybe I should just get smug. The newspapers are trumpeting the good news--the economy is up, crime is down, consumer confidence is high. Of course, a few million people are suddenly finding it hard to breathe, but what the fuck--maybe this New World Order is the best of all possible worlds, given the complexity of our eight billion strong civilization. So why is it that, at least once a day, I feel like climbing on top of a tall building (preferably on Wall Street) and unleashing a fussilade. Is it just a personal failing? Maybe so. Now, maybe you know who R.U. Sirius is. Maybe you don't. But, along with Queen Mu, I was the first goddamned person to use the terms "cyberculture" and 'the new edge." Yup. I'm responsible for some of that horseshit that some people get $100,000 per second to spew. My (our) MONDO 2000 led to the excrescence of Wired. Smug little whitebread motherfucking toy-fetishizing overfed cunts (and I'm referring almost exclusively to Caucasoid males) all over the world now get to think of themselves as the hippest of the hip. *I* did that. OK... I didn't do it alone. Umm, that's debatable actually. You know what I *hate* more than anything else? People who can't hang with psychotic megalomaniac ambiguously humorous lust-filled fuck-all beyond-the-pale hangloose drugged-up revolting people. And people who think that a joke is only a joke. In fact, any time anybody says, "Oh that's *just*"... BANG! Fist in the face. Nothing is ever *just* anything. Our Mission Our mission at REVOLTING! is to drive a virtual rented truck filled with 4,000 pound of homemade explosives right up the tight little trademarked, lawyer-infested, well-oiled (with money) sphincter of old and new media culture and splatter it to Queendom come. Why do I want to do that? Because mediocre fuckfaces like Michael Ovitz make hundreds of millions of dollars and get to run dynamic businesses that achieve their aims, those aims being putting out stupid, distracting movies, each one of which costs more money than certain entire African countries filled with hundreds of thousands of starving children, while *I* have to struggle to pay my rent. Ultimately, that's why I'm REVOLTING! I've been out here on the periphery of media culture for the entire decade, pointlessly jumping through hoops, almost scoring deals from various entertainment, technocultural, and publishing entities. I've listened to what both the foot soldiers and the powerhouses in the world of communitainment think makes a project worth doing and not worth doing. And believe me, these people need to be shot. With ketamine at the very least. "R.U., we love ya baby, but we think this just isn't a commercial enough idea for us. Maybe you could borrow $50 from your mommy and live in your car for another five years and..." BOOM! Out goes a kneecap. REVOLTING! Guerrillas? No. That Would Be Wrong. Don't get me wrong. I'm not a violent person... most days. But I would like to gently suggest that the only solution to the current problem of lopsided access to resources unmatched since the days when we actually called nobles and serfs what they are is for a team of independent assassins to kill all the billionaires Calm down. This ain't exactly Pol Pot. One could still keep up to $999.999,999.99. It simply seems to me that a certain balance needs to be restored to the human economic. I simply can't believe that Bill Gates is a more valuable human being than all of the school teachers in America combined. Even if you doubt the existence of "justice" (and I do), there comes a time when things get too out-of-balance and needs to be corrected. Getting the government to tax all income beyond a billion won't work. Too many loopholes on the one hand and more bureaucracy on the other. Anyway, it's *their* government. No. The best approach is to let the word go out, internationally, that it's too dangerous to have *that* much money. Now, I'm not suggesting that REVOLTING! cadre meet in secret locations in the Bavarian Alps on May 1 in the year 1998 to enjoy good beer and a retinue of blonde-haired blue-eyed sex slaves of all nine genders paid for by Moammar Khadafy and plot out the beginnings of this world wide revolt. No. And please don't do any radical deeds in my name, thus bringing unwanted controversy that might draw attention to all the books, recordings, lecture tours, and periodicals I'm trying to sell. That would be wrong. In fact, forget everything I've just said. *Post what thou wilt shall be the whole of the law Aleister McCrowley, 1999* If you want to have freedom in a media-saturated world you have to learn not to give a fuck about your public image. Be REVOLTING! In fact, have your public image be even more REVOLTING! than *you* are. That way, anything that you might actually *do* will seem mild. We at REVOLTING! believe in Radical Tabloidism. Random acts of actionable communication straight from the id. Technology has given us this vast shared infospace but there's no freedom of movement because people have been socialized to practice self-censorship. And because our virtual tongues are imprisoned by excessive libel, copyright and trademark restrictions. REVOLTING! intends to bring spontaneity to cyberspace. Caveat Of course, this whole website is a parody! Don't believe anything we say. Don't get mad. Don't sue us. Don't believe us. Don't be afraid to advertise with us. Dont' hate us just because we're REVOLTING! It's all JUST A JOKE heh... |
